sooooo…..eating/constant thoughts are very consuming at this point. I wanted to get out of vacation to avoid food/people/etc.
I have a lot of family members who are voicing concern, constantly asking me if Im starving myself again.....Ive become an automatic liar.
My boss/coworkers keep making comments, the other day, my boss said I look really skinny, I said thank you and she said it was a compliment I said it was for me and she replied that it wasn't suppose to be. We actually just hung up and she offered to take me to therapy each week so I don't have to admit I relapsed to Jon. Its nice but I cant ask her to do that.
It is def getting worse. I am now taking pictures of my body each day. We have a work event coming up and I am trying to get out of it because I don't want to be surrounded by food with my coworkers
I feel a mixed of emotions Part of me is happy, and I want to show everyone my bones that are now peeking thru, the other part of me is depressed because here I am at 29 years old having issues with eating/food. Makes me feel like a failure and I feel like I cant be honest with others about it which in the end just makes me feel lonely.
I feel like I am at a fork in the road....
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